Why am I setting them up for such failure? I guess because it is summer and I spend the school year harassing and haranguing them about math, reading, and getting out of bed. I plan their logistics, organize their lives and gear and it gets to be wearing on us all. I'll get us all from Point A to Point B with everything we need for the day, but there is not a lot of enjoyment in that. I need, we need, this summer to just enjoy ourselves; to remember how to enjoy being together. These kids of mine are getting big awfully fast and I just want to slow down a little and see them, really see them.
I forgot how happy SG is when she wakes up on her own time. How much patience she has for her brother and how much sparkle she has when she is not laboring over homework after a long day at school. Many times she told me how hard she worked in Athletics and while I heard her, I was not always listening. Attentively anyway. I was listening with my eyes, ears and heart last week while I watched her keep up with the boys and just whole-heartedly go after the drills at her Strength camp. My girl, the one who galloped instead of running the first ten years of her life, is an athlete. They say you can explode with pride but it was more than that for me; I spontaneously combusted with pride. My plans for her this summer include watching her throw her head back and squeal with laughter, trying weird hair tricks I see on Facebook on her glorious mane of hair and sitting down and listening when she is talking.
The boy and I have had quite a year and we need a summer before he strolls in middle school this fall. I am on him a lot to get this done, or did you do this or good grief WHY is there a colander in the middle of the living room? We need this time for me to step back and for him to step up and show me what he can do without me telling him to do it. I watched him at his parkour class today and I got great joy out of watching him and secondly watching him look over each time he did something to see if I was watching. The boy that has been stiff arming me all year still likes to know I am watching. Point taken buddy, I'm watching. My plans for him include seven million games of basketball in the driveway, laughing when his jokes aren't funny and watching him jump into the pool too many times to count.
In addition to actually seeing my kids and enjoying them, I want to teach them important things. Things like how to cook rice or pasta or how to clean up dog poop, all valuable things to know. Plus their newfound knowledge could eventually make my life easier, as in "I will be home in 30 minutes, start some rice" or "Mom the dog pooped in the dining room, but don't worry, I already picked it up." I want to teach them that they should always try something new. I want them to learn that it is okay to be bored. I am not threatening them with chores if they say they are bored, but I am not offering to fix it either. They will figure something out and then they can continue to figure something out as life goes on. Finally, I want them to really understand that your brother or sister can be more than just your sibling, they can be your friend. I may need to revisit that one myself.
I am not sure what will happen if we don't do any math or any other school type learning this summer. I might be condemning them to a lifetime of state schools and a career in public service. There are worse things in life though and for me one of those worse things would not be just stopping to enjoy them. Or letting them just be kids: lazy, a little smelly, crazy funny and amazing kids.
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